I have always been really bad at accepting compliments. Whenever people tell me something good about myself my instinct is always to disagree and shoot myself down. I think it started as an effort to be humble… Usually when people openly love themselves they’re ridiculed for being arrogant and self-centred, so I’ve never wanted to be that kind of person. However, on thinking about it recently it’s really been annoying me because there’s a difference between arrogance and self-love.
Nowadays if I were to say to people “I’m really loving my hair today” at least someone would provide a reason as to why what I said was wrong and overconfident, whether they do it to my face or behind my back. We live in a world where we’re so ready to shoot each other down; girls call other girls “sluts” and “bitches”, we gossip and judge like crazy, there is no happy medium for how to act. If I disagree with your compliment I’m “insecure and should love myself more”, but if I agree I’m “arrogant and love myself too much and should know that I’m not perfect”.
However, the biggest problem isn’t even other people, it’s ourselves. I’ve been disagreeing with compliments so long that I’ve started to believe that I don’t deserve them. Someone will tell me my face is clear and I’ll immediately mention the spot forming on my cheek; someone will tell me I suit my glasses and I’ll mumble about how they make me look geeky. I feel like overtime I’ve been socially conditioned to believe that I don’t deserve to be complimented. But I do. We all do. We should all learn to love ourselves a little better, and to let other people love themselves too. Yes, arrogance is really annoying… but it is not the same as appreciating yourself for who you are.
I’ll start off the compliments… You’re all amazing for reading this
Lot’s of love,
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